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  • Family fun

    “It’s about communicating with our kids,

    talking to them and listening to

    their answers.”



  • children.


    Now on Sale!

        Respect YOUR Children

         A Practical Guide To Effective Parenting


Featured Shows

blogtalkradio-logo Listen to Jay at BlogTalkRadio live. Access past radio episodes and follow for future episodes! Explore Jay's shows which discuss various issues within the family relationship and assist people to become a generation of change, and not repeat the negative patterns from their past.

See Featured ListSee Past Episodes

Who is the Family Answer Man?

Jay Fitter is a licensed family therapist with 20 years experience and answers your questions on all relationships issues.

Why He Does it…

My father had a 3rd grade education, and my mother 5th grade. My childhood was spent in poverty, moving in and out of apartments and motels. Much of our food came from church donations and we had used clothing.

My father was verbally and physically abusive and died when I was sixteen. I had already been working to help support the family, but after he passed , I had to work full time. My parents were told by school administrators when I was in elementary school that I was going to be a drop out. I attended in excess of twenty schools, often not even remembering what state I was in. There was virtually no adult guidance through my childhood and teen tears, as a result I made a lot of poor choices.

When I became an adult, I decided that I didn’t want to pass this kind of life on to my children.

I have seen the positive changes that have occurred in parents, kids, and even hard core gang members in juvenile hall. I know that we can’t change the past, but we don’t have to repeat it either.

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Ask Jay

Ask Jay

Ask Family Therapist, Jay Fitter through Facebook. Present your questions during a LIVE show and your answers may be aired.


[  Live Facebook Feed ]

Teenager Smoking Pot:
Q. I found a weed pipe and lighter in my 15 y sons room. He claims he only tried it once and purchased from school. He attends an esteemed private school predominately Caucasian. I'm at a loss, I need to protect and educate my son but I want to report to the school. He refuses to tell because he is afraid of the repercussions of peers and possibly being expelled... Help!!!!?? 😢

A. thank you for your question. It's always nice to hear from concerned parents who are thinking of their children's best interest.
Let me first assure you, that attending a private predominantly Caucasian school in no way diminishes the problem of substance abuse among teenagers. This is a problem that many parents struggle with everywhere. As far as your specific issue is concerned, my guess is that this is not the first time that your son has smoked weed. Having the paraphernalia in his room makes me think that this may have been going on for a while. In essence, what he is saying is that he wants to protect the other kids who are also smoking pot with him, so that they don't get in trouble from the school or their parents. Do you really want to accommodate that request? I would consider contacting a school administrator to discuss this issue. Generally speaking, a school does not administer consequences for pot smoking that occurred off of school property. However, having them speak with him about the potential consequences if he's caught in the future, as well as letting him know that they will be "keeping an eye on him" may have the desired effect that you are looking for. If this doesn't work, you can let him know that cell phones, Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram and other forms of social media are a privilege, and thus require a certain amount of trust. It is important that he understand that your goal is to help him to be successful in life, and not allow poor choices today to negatively impact his future.

If you know someone that may benefit from the information on this page, feel free to forward this post to them. To get all of my future posts, just "like" Family Answer Man on Facebook, not just this article. I will attempt to answer all of your questions submitted on this page in a timely manner. Send a private message if you don't want your name to be seen.

1 day ago  ·  



“It’s about communicating with our kids, talking to them and listening to their answers”


Respect Your Children, Now Available on 


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Media Kit

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Get in Touch

Contact Mr. Jay Fitter on Facebook, Twitter, or through email.  To schedule an appointment, please contact Jay’s office phone number – (951) 272-8304

Jay’s office is located in Southern California.

jay [at] familyanswerman.com

(951) 272-8304